


A Summer's Smile

by Orangeflowerpetals



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Reunions, Romance?, Suicide Attempt, and once again this is inspired by a song, happy ending if you squint, lost time memory, really kinda dark, technically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:48:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21936973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Orangeflowerpetals/pseuds/Orangeflowerpetals
Summary: If only he could return to those days.... those beautiful summer days...Sparkling jade green eyes stood out against the green stalks of the sunflowers, their petals just a shade darker than blond hair that glimmered in the bright sun. And a boyish grin, one Eiji thought he’d never see again.“Welcome home, Onii-chan.”And Eiji couldn’t help the painful smile that shone on his face or the stabbing pang in his heart as he once again looked upon the face of the person who he thought to never see again.
Relationships: Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	A Summer's Smile

**Author's Note:**

> ...Now 18, a boy once wishing
> 
> Surrounded by days he was missing
> 
> Your blurring smile’s still the same, ever so summery and pretty
> 
> “I’m sorry, back then I did die”
> 
> “Now that you’re here, let’s both say goodbye”
> 
> Don’t say that, stay here with me, in my eternal sleep
> 
> Watching on, the figures saw as I finally was freed...
> 
> -Lost Time Memory,  
> Jin,  
> my translation

Eiji’s footsteps silently pressed down into the grass as he walked a little hesitantly through the field of sunflowers.

The sun above him lit up the field in a soft yellow glow. 

A perfect summer’s day...

Eiji swallowed a bitter lump in his throat as memories from that summer came back.

“Eiji!”

The voice rang clear and urgent, and Eiji instantly knew who it belonged to. Tears bubbled up at his eyes, cheeks heating up, his heart beating rapidly, and he started running as fast as he could,letting a name fall out of his lips. 

The grass didn’t stain his jeans, the dirt not reaching his shoes as he ran, ran with blurry vision, with a heart that kept crying out, not stopping to think out this could not be possible, that Ash...

“Eiji!” 

And then Eiji saw him. 

His pace halted and all he could do was stare as time slowed down.

Sparkling jade green eyes stood out against the green stalks of the sunflowers, their petals just a shade darker than blond hair that glimmered in the bright sun. And a boyish grin, one Eiji thought he’d never see again.

“Welcome home, Onii-chan.”

And Eiji couldn’t help the painful smile that shone on his face or the stabbing pang in his heart as he once again looked upon the face of the person who he thought to never see again.

“Ash!”

And he couldn’t help his feet, as they immediately ran towards Ash, his tears that wouldn’t stop falling, or his arms that wanted to embrace him, to see if Ash was truly there. 

But sure enough, his body made contact with Ash’s, and Eiji enveloped him in a warm embrace, sobbing weakly. 

Ash made a little gasp of surprise, but then slowly and gently returned it. 

“Eiji....”

But then Eiji pulled away, a bit worried, a bit angry. “Where have you been? Why, why did you not meet us at the Airport?! Why did you not come with us?! Why-”

His rant was cut off as Ash held his hand. “I wasn’t expecting to see you again. But I read your letter....”

Eiji’s cheeks were dusted lightly with pink as his eyes widened a bit. Ash let his eyes drift shut gently and tilted his head, and Eiji instinctively did the same, leaning in as Ash closed the gap, stroking Eiji’s cheek slowly. 

Eiji felt Ash’s lips press against his own, as warm as he could remember. And as soon as he could, he returned the kiss lovingly.

“I love you..... I always wanted to meet you again....”

“I.... love... you too...?” The words sounded foreign on Ash’s tongue. Eiji realized that Ash hadn’t had many chances to say it in his life.

Quirking his lips up in a playful smile, he tackled Ash, and they both fell down onto the soft soil laughing, Eiji holding Ash tight in his arms. 

They stayed in silent and peaceful company for a few moments afterwards, warm and safe, happy, and content. 

Ash whispered gently. “Eiji...”

“...Hm?”

“How are you here?”

Eiji tried, but he couldn’t think of how he was here. He remembered he was in the Sunflower field again.... and then heard Ash’s voice... but anything before that was a blur. “... I cannot remember! But-“

“Hey yo!” 

And walking towards them with a grin was none other than Shorter.

Shorted clasped a surprised Eiji on the back, leaning over. “You’re finally here too huh? Man, you don’t look a day older!”

Ash frowned, moving back a little. “Now that he’s mentioned it, you really don’t.”

“I... don’t?” Eiji’s hand flew to the back of his neck, surprised to find his hair short again. And only then, did he take in Ash’s appearance. Not a day over that summer. “You look the same too! Both of you do!”

For the rest of the afternoon, Ash, Eiji, and Shorter walked in the sunflower field, Eiji stopping them some moments to take pictures. 

Then they came to a clearing. 

The sunflower field opened up to an open expanse of golden wheat, which swayed in the wind around their knees. 

The sky was a brilliant mix of red, orange, and yellow, pink and blue streaks, and almost transparent white clouds that drifted elegantly over. 

It was almost like a dream. 

Shorter laughed and ran ahead of them towards what Eiji made out to be a cottage in the centre of the field.

Ash grabbed hold of Eiji’s hand and together they ran all the way to the house.

Eiji learned what Ash had been up to ever since... 

Well, ever since the day Eiji went back to Japan. 

Ash had first started out in the sunflower field too and had met with Shorter who at the time, complained that he was in the city, and was annoyed when he Ash had called him out of it. Though somehow he could still go back...

He felt the overwhelming urge to cough, and as he did so, he felt as if he was suffocating. 

It didn’t hurt but it didn’t feel quite normal...

An image came to his mind, almost as if it just happened...

“Are you alright?”

Ash was frowning worriedly in his direction. They were sitting side by side on the couch.

Eiji was once again beside Ash. He had yearned to be for so long, although he couldn’t feel any of the pain he felt once before. Even though he finally remembered. He would be burdening Ash, he knew, even though the latter had asked. 

Eiji just gently snuggled into Ash, emotion threatening to overcome him. “Yes. Are you alright?” Eiji smiled a little as Ash softly ran his fingers through Eiji’s hair, the feeling calm and peaceful. 

“Yeah... ”

Eiji felt Ash gently press his lips against Eiji’s forehead.

“With you here.”

But as the minutes ticked on, Eiji felt increasingly guilty for not telling Ash. On the other hand, Ash deserved to know, right?

“Ash,” Eiji sat up, pulling his love's arm away. 

Ash pouted childishly but didn't make a move, his brows furrowed. 

“Ash, I have to say something.”

“What is it?”

“I remember how I got here.”

Ash became little shocked, his expression becoming serious. “What was it?”

Eiji suddenly found the ground very interesting. "It's okay forget I said anything."

"No! What happened? How-how did you die?" Ash whispered.

Taking a deep breath, Brown eyes met green, and Eiji focused on them. "Please don't hate me for this..."

And it seemed that Ash understood, because his eyes widened, tearing up a little, and he gently pulled Eiji into an embrace.

"Eiji giggled a little, all worry gone. "Normally, I'd be the one comforting you!"

"What even is normal?" Ash murmured into Eiji's neck.

Suddenly, Eiji lost his balance and fell onto the couch.

“Eiji!”

Ash was leaning over him now, fearful. He grasped Eiji’s hand, which was growing more transparent by the second. “Eiji! No....” and then Ash seemed to realise something. He smiled slightly, moving to where Eiji's head would be resting against his chest, and holding Eiji tight within his arms. “I guess it’s not your time yet, Onii-chan."

Eiji's eyes started watering with choked sobs. “No, no, Ash... I- I don't want to go yet!” 

Ash just kept smiling sorrowfully, pressing a kiss to Eiji's forehead. “I’ll be waiting right here, so you don’t have to hurry back to us.”

Eiji reached out his hand, which Ash grasped and held within his own again. “I missed you... So- so much....”

“Me too... I’m so sorry I died back then.”

“I should’ve taken you back to Japan with me.”

“I’ve always loved you...”

“...And I always will...”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**12:30 pm, New York**

Without bothering to glance into the mirror, with some tugging and a little pain, Eiji had freed his hair from the ponytail at the base of his neck. It was as if the ponytail was a heavyweight, and his head was finally free.

Just as he was freeing himself.

He placed a note on the edge of the bathroom sink, trapped under his giant and heavy glasses. 

Eiji sighed as he turned on the faucet and got in the bath. Such a mundane task. 

So tiring... but he was already tired. 

Tired of this. 

Tired of life. 

He got in, numb to the boiling temperature, and how it would have stung him otherwise.

If anything, the slight pain was welcome, and he indulged in it. The last pain he would ever feel.

Though, he hesitated. What would Ibe think? What would his family think when they found him?

But no. It was too late now, too late to stop the pills flowing through his system, too late to change his mind. Besides... they would understand... right?

Making sure it didn’t fall in, he held a picture close to his face, drinking in every small detail, laughing smiles, jade eyes... 

If only he could return to those days.... those beautiful summer days...

He closed his eyes and leaned back fully, burying his nose under the warm and welcoming water.

Ash... 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**10:07 am, New York**

When Eiji opened his eyes, he was blinded by sunlight. 

Or he would have been if someone hadn’t been blocking his line of sight.

“Eiji! Eiji, what the hell happened?! Are you okay? Sheesh, you should have told me you were planning on dying so I could get you some help!”

“Sing-“

“I had to walk up to your apartment when you didn’t answer your phone! We were worried! You were legit dead for a few minutes!”

“Sing! I’m fine!”

“Like hell you are. We brought you to the hospital, you were unconscious. You’re lucky they don’t remember us.”

Eiji didn’t feel lucky in the slightest. He didn’t say that, however. “Do you... remember Ash?” he quietly whispered.

Sing's face softened a little, just a little, as he rocked on his heels. “Who doesn’t? Damn shame what happened. Becoming Chinatown's boss was hard enough before.”

“He’s happy.”

“He better be.”

**Author's Note:**

> Mina-san, don't do what Eiji did, living gets better
> 
> Eiji survived tho but still
> 
> Also if anyone reads this, Happy belated Holidays!


End file.
